Bullying May Make You Feel Better, But To Others It's Worse.

The text message said that Lucy Josephs was a failure. It said she was ugly, had no style and the world hated her. At least that was what it said to Lucy. That and a whole lot more that she was struggling to understand. The actual words read 'You'd better not come tonight it's going to be bad enough already!'

Lucy tapped the mobile screen and the message disappeared from view. She only wished it was as easy to tap her heart and erase the trace it had left there. She sat back and watched the evening rain drizzle down the car window. It truly was a miserable night.

'Was that another one of those messages?' her mum asked from the driving seat. Lucy nodded.

'Have you reported it yet?' asked Jill, Lucy's older sister who was sitting in the passenger seat.

'Yes,' she lied.

'You mustn't let it get to you, they're only jealous' said her mother sighing. 'I never should have given you that phone for Christmas. It was supposed to make you safer.'

'No it's fine, I love it,' said Lucy knowing that affording the mobile had been no small thing for her mother, and she was signed up for an eighteen month contract. It had been nothing but trouble though. She didn't know who it was who was sending her the messages, and she didn't know how they'd got her number, but they'd slowly taken over her life. She was getting several texts a day now, all abusive, all hurtful, and she was beginning to be afraid of what was around the next corner. The phone hadn't made her feel safe at all.

The car pulled up outside the school and Lucy and Jill stepped out. The building looked like a large shadow in the darkness and Lucy felt a shiver run down her spine.

'Come on,' said Jill. 'I don't want to be late for my own concert.' As a senior in her final year of high school Jill had become involved in helping to organise this year's school talent show, and she took her position very seriously. Lucy hurried behind her pulling her worn oversized coat around her to keep her warm as the raindrops fell all around them. They headed straight for the hall where the show was to take place.

'Oh no, people are already taking their seats,' said Jill. 'We'd better get backstage.' All Lucy really wanted to do was take a seat and wait for the lights to go out, but she'd promised her mother she'd be part of the show tonight.

'You have such a beautiful voice,' he mother had argued three months back when the concert had first been announced. 'It would be a real shame to waist your talent.'

Lucy had been considering it. She did love to sing, but it had been that very night that the first text message had come through. 'How does it feel to be tall and lanky like a giraffe?' it had asked and taken Lucy by surprise. She'd always known she wasn't the most popular girl in school, but then she'd always been quite proud of being a little different. But text by text her self confidence had deflated and in the end it had taken some doing to get her to agree to do the performance.

'Do it for me,' her mother had pleaded as she tucked a stray strand of Lucy's unruly mob of chocolate springs behind her ear. 'Like you used to when you were little. You used to love performing for us all back then.'

Lucy smiled a painful smile. 'Alright mum, I'll do it for you - because you've always been there for me.'

As Lucy followed Jill through the hall a loud bleep sounded from her coat pocket. Her heart thumping, she took it out and tapped the little envelope once more. Another message filled the screen.

'Why don't you go back to the circus FREAK!' it read.

Lucy bit her bottom lip to keep from crying, though she could feel the tears well up inside, squeezing at her throat. She glanced around the hall to try and catch a smirk from a familiar face, but she saw none. The texter remained anonymous.

'Let me see that,' said Jill as she snatched the phone from Lucy's hand. She read the message and her own lips tightened.

'I knew I shouldn't have worn these tights,' said Lucy looking at the multicoloured stripes that ran down her long legs.

'What's wrong with them?' asked Jill. 'They used to be mine!'

'I know,' Lucy sighed. 'Nearly all my clothes used to be yours.' Their mother had done her best by them, but since their father had left money had been tight. Lucy had always been at the mercy of her older sister's style, and it had never worked well for her. It didn't help that they had completely different looks. Jill's hair was much farer and a lot straighter than Lucy's and somehow her height seemed right for her, while Lucy often felt as though she were walking on stilts.

'Listen to me, this person is a coward, and you are better than that' said Jill as she shoved Lucy's phone into her own pocket. She hurried Lucy back stage. 'You're braver than them and tonight you're going to prove it to everyone. Here put this on,' she said unhooking a simple but elegant black dress from one of the rails. 'This at least wasn't mine. It's new. I thought it might help with the performance.'

Sick of Stereotypes..

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.
I don't FLIRT WITH GUYS AT SCHOOL, so I MUST be gay.
I don't like the SUN, so I MUST be albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I'm POSTING THIS, so I MUST be a groupie.

You Don't Know What You Have Until It's Gone.

Eric was chased by all the girls in our high school.
Cathlyn was one of those popular girls. Cheerleader, sexy, and stylish.
Carol was just one of those plain and average girls .
Cathlyn and Carol were both totally crazy and wacko over Eric.
Cathlyn didn't have to do anything to attract Eric.
For she was already attractive enough.
Carol on the other hand, showered Eric which love and care.
Carol wasn't ugly at all.
In fact, she looked sweet and pleasant.
But she wasn't a cheerleader, she didn't were spaghetti-straps or tubes.
So like everyone expected, Eric chose Cathlyn.
For Carol was just one ordinary and plain girl.
While Cathlyn was labele d as the cool and attractive type.

Eric always insulted Carol.
Telling her what a 'Plain Jane' she was.
And how dumb she looked.
Which obviously made Carol feel so hurt and useless.
That's life. Carol never gave up though.
She wanted to prove something to Eric.
She wanted to prove that looks aren't everything.
She studied hard, really hard.
She became the top girl, and all the guys who once ignored her, chased her.

But she never forgot Eric.
Everyday, she put a red rose in Eric's locker.
Always with the same words.
'I care for you, and I always will'
Because she knew that Eric was facing a hard time.
Eric began to realise.
How dumb he had been.
His beloved girlfriend, Cathlyn.
Was flirting with other guys.
He regretted for choosing the wrong girl.
Cathlyn broke up with Eric later.
For she had found a wealthier guy.
Eric felt so cheated, stupid and dumb.
He went to look for Carol.
He knelt on his knees, and said.
"Carol, please forgive me. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
Carol rejected him, much to everyone's surprise.
She only uttered these words.
"You've suffered a great loss, so I don't want you to face another one"
Eric felt disappointed.
He didn't understand a word that she said to him.
But they became good friends.
Did everything together.
Eric began to change into someone better.
Because Carol showered him with the love he never experienced before.
His ex-girlfriends had never treated him that way.
They just accepted him for his looks.
But Carol accepted him for himself .
She changed him.
Carol continued putting a red rose into his locker everyday.
With the same words. She never forgot.
One day, Carol didn't turn up in school.
She didn't come for a week.
At first, Eric thought that she was on a vacation with her family.
Because she told him that she would be going Hawaii with them.
But one day. He received a call from the General Hospital.
Saying that Carol was about to die.
She had been suffering from cancer.
But Carol forbade them from telling him.
Because she didn't want Eric to worry about her.
But now that she was about to die.
She wanted to see Eric for the last time.
Eric rushed to the hospital.
When he saw how weak Carol was.
Tears began rushing down his cheeks.
He whispered.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier? Why did you hide this from me?"
She looked at him . And smiled weakly at him.
"When I said that I didn't want you to suffer from facing another loss, I meant this. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to worry. I wanted to spend my last days with you cheerfully." Eric looked at her.
"You can't leave me!" he said.
"What will I be without you?"
"You'll be who you are now. I will always be there by your side. Never forget that. Cherish those times. Live life happily. And one more thing."
"Yes?" "I love you" And she died. Eric screamed.
He still couldn't accept Carol's death.
He had only spent a month with Carol.
A month. But Carol changed his life in a way.
A way that no one could ever explain. He regretted.
But he knew that Carol would always be keeping an eye on him from Heaven.
Sometimes We just don't appreciate those people who really care for us.
Until they leave us. Until we lose them. Then we regret.
Outer beauty doesn't matter; it's the inner one that counts.
It's better to tell someone how much you love them.
Rather than to not tell them and lose them without telling them.
You'll regret Love is. When we fight till the very last minute.
Just to show and tell someone how much we love them.

Love's Betrayal.

A girl named Melanie was being bullied at school.  People laughed at her. She pretended not to care, and tried not to listen to them.. But inside, It was killing her. She felt no one cared about her, That if she died.. No one would attend her funeral. Until.. Melanie met this boy. Within minutes of meeting him, she was fully in love.. She knew he would never be interested in her. So she went home, and cried uncontrolably. The next day at school, He spoke to her.. She felt he was the only one. His name was James.. She got to know him. They became friends.. They fell in love.. She became happy.. Melanie said to James "James, I need to tell you..I love you more than I have ever loved anyone before.." As she leaned forward to hug him, he jurks back. He told her "You know I LOVED you.. But my heart has been stolen by another girl.." Melanie lowered her head, upset, and replied to him "Okay, thats fine, just.. fine.." She attempted to hold in her tears, and looked up to James once again, her eyes watering. It's when she knew that this was about to end. Frozen in the moment, time was standing still. Melanie spoke once again to James; "I would die for you.. Good-bye.." As the bell rang and James was going to turn his back, Melanie whispered "Forever.." And ran home. She puts her bag down, and ran to the kitchen, went to the cabinet and grabbed a knife, then ran up to her room. She knew it was destined to end wrong. She sat in her room, on her bed, crying and starting to cut her wrists. Afterwards, she covered her face with her hands, leaning back knowing she only had a few minutes left.. Then.. Her phone rang. She answered.. It was James. "Hello?I need to tell you I was wrong, I love you.. Not the other girl. I have been so stupid and blind.. I love you." James told her.. Melanie replied "Its too late.." While her voice was weakening, and hangs up. She bled to death on the floor, and James runs to her home, Goes to her room, And lays next to her corpse. He kissed her, took the knife, and took his shirt off. He cuts across his arm "She was all I ever loved."  He cut his wrists, held Melanie's hand, and noticed on the wall.. there was writing in blood. Saying "I said I would die for you.. And I did.." James' vision blurred while his eyes were closing. Therefore, he joined her.

Autumn's Back-Fire.

It was autumn again. Sucking in the warm morning breeze, Mary smiled as she stretched her arms wide, as though embracing the beauty of nature. Jumping up and down in glee, she swirled around in the garden, with her long silky jet-black hair dancing behind her. By anyone’s standards, she was beautiful. Her cherry lips often gave way to smiles and laughter and her eyes a beautiful shade of blue.

She let the wind sting her cheeks as she ran around the garden, shrieking in joy, when she skidded on the fallen leaves only to find herself resting on the strong grasp of a hand. Opening her eyes, her heart momentarily stopped beating as she came face to face with a freckled-faced man. He grinned, revealing a row of yellowish teeth, and then opened his mouth, sending out a weave of nasty stench which smelled like a thousand rotten apples. Mary widened her eyes in horror, shocking the man as he lost grip of her and she fell on the floor.

Moaning miserably, she got up slowly from her supine position and grunted, flinging expletives at the bewildered man. But he only looked down without a word. “Are you mute! Can’t you even say sorry!” Mary cried out in frustration and stomped off. The man sighed and shook his head, picking up his broom to continue sweeping the fallen leaves.

The next day, Mary sat under a tree in the same garden, burying her face in her hands, sobbing uncontrollably. Suddenly, she felt her nose twitch as an unbearable stench gushed into her nostrils and she looked up, only to see a white handkerchief.

“You again” she folded her arms, obviously annoyed. The man lifted his right hand to the side of his forehead, an indication that he was sorry. He then pointed to the handkerchief, motioning her to wipe her tears. “A-Are you really… mute?” Mary stammered, afraid to know the answer. Instead, the man smiled, and distorted his face using his hands so he looked hilariously frightful. Mary laughed, and he whipped out a piece of paper from his back pocket and started scribbling. Like this, a few hours passed.

“If only my boyfriend was as understanding as you, John…” She mused sadly and continued, “But it doesn’t matter anymore.” And they sat in silence in the middle of the garden where brown leaves scattered, and where a beautiful friendship was already blossoming.

Day after day, Mary would look for John in the garden, where he would be sweeping the leaves. They enjoyed each other’s company immensely, even if it meant communicating through scraps of paper. Many a time, Mary did the talking and John, the listening, always ready with a handkerchief to chase away her sorrows. Whenever Mary was feeling down, John would bring her to the fields in the outskirts of the city where sunflowers bloomed its prettiest and hatred never existed. He would urge her to tell her unhappiness to a tree and then carve a tiny happy face at that portion of the trunk. Months soon passed, and this humble tree was soon filled with many happy faces. This was their paradise.

Unfortunately, their love was soon put to the test. It was past midnight. Mary was returning home from work and had taken the short cut through a deserted alley when two big burly men appeared before her. They had similar nasty stench drifting out of their mouths and snorted furiously like demented bulls.

“Leave John alone! He’s better off without women! He belongs with us to the underworld!” One of them boomed. Mary, frightened, shrieked and closed her eyes, muttering a short prayer as she anticipated her life to end at this juncture. Seconds passed, and she gingerly opened her eyes, to see an outline of a familiar figure wrestling with the two burly men. John was punched and kicked about like a rag doll. Blood trickling from his nose and forehead, he was sprawled on the ground, defenseless. “That’s what you get for betraying us,” they smirked in satisfaction and swaggered away.

“John!” Mary cried out, lifting him up and hugging him tightly. Examining his face carefully, she realised that like those burly men, he was filthy and smelly, but unlike them, he had the kindest and most beautiful eyes ever. She had come to love this man for who he was. It was a love that needed no words. Garnering the last ounce of strength in him, he took out the white handkerchief he always carried and held it out to her. She received the handkerchief with trembling hands. Inhaling sharply, she let Niagara Falls come.

“Promise me you’ll never leave me no matter what happens” She whispered. With quivering hands, he took out a scrap of paper and pen. “I’ll always be with you” He assured her. “I swear”. Smiling, she held out her last finger in which he hooked against his and they hugged.

Although belonging to different worlds, one a law graduate from Harvard and the other from the underworld, they never mentioned about their difference in status. Instead, their love only grew stronger after that fateful incident.

One day, Mary was on her way to the garden when a gush of fluid was flung at her face. Instantly, she felt a burning sensation in her eyes and the flash of light was soaked up by the spreading dark patches before her eyes. Her ear splitting screaming reverberated to John’s ears as he sallied forward towards the sound, only to see Mary already unconscious on the ground, and he knew it was the work of the two burly men.

Packing the essentials, he decided to leave and quited his job as a sweeper in the garden. Looking at the blissful pictures of Mary and himself, he sighed and threw them away.

“Mary! Can you see me?” Aunts jostled towards the weary girl and waved before her. The image she saw was a blur and she felt groggy. However, it was a great blessing that Mary had regained her sight. Looking into the mirror, she was startled to find that her eyes looked somewhat different. They were the same shade of blue, but now they exuberant great warmth and compassion.

Unfortunately, Mary soon realised that John had left her and was devastated. She bawled her heart out and pinned for him day and night. Thinking back on the promise he made to her, she hated him all the more.

One day, she decided to visit their place of paradise to relieve their happy days together. She walked to the tree where she used to pour out her unhappiness and leaned close to the trunk and touched its rough surface filled with happy faces. She wept uncontrollably as she ran her fingers down the trunk. Unexpectedly, she saw the words ‘I’ll be with you’ engraved on the foot of the tree trunk. Glimmers of hope began to light the darkness as she looked earnestly around, but what she saw left her dumbfounded.

On the bench sat a man with a pair of sunglasses and a walking stick. Under the scorching sun, he was sweating profusely and fished out a white handkerchief from his back pocket to wipe the perspiration. Coincidentally, a photo fell out from the pocket as well. With manifold feelings, Mary picked up the photo and looked at herself in the picture and was shocked. The man groped his back pocket for the photo and became flustered when it was no longer there. Slowly, Mary walked over and placed the photo in the man’s hands. It was only then that she tasted the warm salty wetness of her own tears and realised how hard she was crying.

The man bowed in gratitude and flashed his yellowish teeth which glistened in the morning sun.

“I’ll always be with you… “

Looking at the man who loved her so deeply, she smiled. Touching her eyes which were once his, tears streaked down her cheeks. His eyes brimming with her tears.

He Tore My Heart Out.

I am curling up in my bed like an animal licking its wound. I'm here achingly alone, remembering those special moments with him as well as reminiscing how he had hurt my vulnerable heart.

I was once his princess then day by day my position diminished until I found myself completely out of his life.

He is the guy i had fallen too deeply in love with, the guy I was afraid to meet, the guy whom I've unconditionally surrendered everything.He is the guy i have permitted to hurt me over and over again.

I have made him the center of my world ever since the day i first said "I LOVE YOU" to him. My life revolves around him. I let myself to be fully attached to him, depending my happiness on him. I even neglected the people close to me.

For him, i was only his girl when it suits him while I have set myself as his property. I never learned to say "No" to him. I always acquiesce to everything he said for fear that I'll get to his nerve. 

He had continuously hurt my vulnerable heart while i pampered him with the best love that i could give. I love him for who he is including his flaws. His deep blue eyes and adorable smile... it was then I realized I was falling head over heals in love with him..

I have given up everything to him while he couldn´t even give me the only thing I asked of him, to be the ONLY ONE. I have forgiven him on every infidelity he had committed while he despised me even at the simplest mistakes I´ve done. How would you feel if he even consider you nuisance? It hurts.

I have been blinded by my love for him not to see his blemishes. I have been too deaf to listen to people´s negative thoughts because all i could hear were his words. I have swallowed my pride in countless instances because I'm afraid of losing him. 

People around me didn´t fail to warn me. My relatives have been given me the best advices but i didn´t listen. 

I have cried enough. I have suffered too much. I needed to cut the string attach to him. It's been one day after the break up, i am still here having endless streams of questions. What did i do wrong to be treated that way when i have never failed to let him feel how much he means to me?

Now that he is finally gone, i am trying to pick up the pieces that he´d left. He had definitely taken everything that I have.

I am trying to block him off my mind but he just keeps creeping in. He still resides in my mind.

It happened and no matter how much i cry now, i couldn't do anything but to try to move on.

I wish for his happiness. Hatred for him has no space in my heart. I still want him to come back and admits that he had been a fool of hurting me too much. That´s just how much I love him, I guess.